The taste of the
bitter winter atmosphere mixed with the sweet smell of the holidays overwhelms
me. I open my driver side door and the stale air trapped by the windows that
don’t open rushes out. A fern green 2000 Honda Civic named Lois has been
waiting patiently, with the reflections of nearby trees skewed in her glossy
chassis like the image of clouds in a crystal clear lake. While I sink into the
soft gray interior, I grip the frigid steering wheel in preparation for a joy
ride with my best friend, a bearded Labrador terrier named Denvour.
All anxiety
evaporates from my muscles when I put the key in the ignition and place my foot
on the clutch; the stresses of adolescent life seem to melt away with the
prospect of a late afternoon jaunt. I turn on the indifferently dim lights and
gingerly turn my head to back out of the driveway, while piles of shoes and
clothes catch my eye in the too-small back seat
Though I wish to smell only the vanilla air
freshener that I had previously placed next to me, the light stench of dog
invades my nostrils. Denvour glances over at me, waiting for the window to roll
down. She is dreaming of warmer times when her head would protrude from the
car, tongue out and ears blown straight back with the wind. Occasionally, her
front paws would reach the window as she pushed life’s boundaries – as well as
her upper body – to the maximum. However, a layer of translucent frost envelops
the car, sending shivers down my spine.
I
scrutinize the straight road ahead with its two perfectly parallel yellow
lines. I’m not exactly sure where I’m going but that is not the point; I don’t
need to know. I will simply take each turn as it comes, right then left.
Thoughts overwhelm me as my mind wanders, recalling specific moments and
replaying them. Twenty of my favorite songs whirl through the seven-foot space
and the muffled bass thumps to the beat of my heart when it races through
excitement, hurt, anger. The car’s low groan matches mine as we slow to a stop
at a traffic light and my skin is warmed by beams of sunlight breaking through
the glass. My ears are awash with the soft breath of Denvour as she rests back
into the seat in a moment of relaxation. I let my foot off the clutch too
quickly and the car leaps forward like a prize-winning steed. “Oops”, I whisper
under my breath as I chuckle at my own mistake and regain composure. The jumps caused my worn
tires to spin and I almost fishtail into the other lane. Luckily, I’m able to
reverse the impending spin and continue along Main Street unscathed.
I'm
compelled to stop at Dunkin Donuts for fresh, steaming coffee and a munchkin
for the mutt. Warm Columbian flavor hits my tongue in small splashes, teasing
my taste buds. The smell of java mixed with the dry heated air brings daydreams
of Christmas morning. I tune in to the local 24-hour holiday radio station,
crank up the volume, and sing ostentatiously.
As
the world around me is transforms into darkness and the hour approaches supper,
I’m aware that it is time to return to reality. I reach my parking spot in the
drive and turn down the music in preparation to tuck Lois in for the night.
Denvour hops to the ground and prances to the back door while I wave goodbye
and am given a disguised salutation, a delicate beep as the doors lock.
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